Tuesday, June 21, 2016

Whatsapp(contagious) :- Symptoms, Prevention and Cure || Types Of Whatsapp Users you surely must have dealt with.

Can’t imagine your life without WhatsApp? Welcome to the 21st century! People start whatsapping because they simply got nothing to do! WhatsApp groups have gained extreme popularity and almost every WhatsApp user has minimum 3 groups on their phone. Anyway, so I'm sure all of you have some WhatsApp group chats going on in your phone right now. No? You must be a social recluse then. Because even my most anti-social friends are busy whatsapping these days.
So I would like to hit a different zone today. Whatsapp comes with some serious sh*t along with an ease of communication. So um, to all of its users, I would like to say a few things:

1.       “Hey there! I am using whatsapp.” This status is for the ones who actually aren’t using whatsapp. You can only put a status if you’re using whatsapp. So I guess it is pretty clear to all of us that you’re using whatsapp.

2    Admin, you are not administering affairs of a state or a country. Thoda kam Bhaav khaaya karo.

3.       I don’t have a senior audience but if you’re reading this, trust me. Nobody, not even a single person except you is interested in those Good Morning texts. Really.

4.       Stop Spamming guys. Oh well that’s me. I know I irritate you but I actually don’t have an option. Sorry Guys.

5.       Stop adding people to unnecessary groups. We can’t leave them because it may hurt your sentiments. Or you may end up getting this.

6.       When people change a group’s name when it is someone’s birthday. It is the duty of the birthday guy/girl to change it back to its original name the next day. Just because it looks good, don’t keep it forever. We would love to change, but we just think that it will make you sad. I don’t know where the sadness comes from, but trustme  a weird feeling arises.


7.       Stop welcoming people when they get added in a group. Boys don’t welcome boys. Problem arises when a girl joins a group and problem get even more severe if she is pretty. Guy who hasn’t replied in like a last decade comes up with a “Hi Priya”

     While Japan is busy making modifications in structures of earthquake proof buildings, majority of busy sharing “ Main (insert appropriate word) ye chahata hu ki aap ye message sabke saath share kare aur unko (insert appropriate word) banaye. Me apna kaam kar liya hai. agar ise banana vale (insert appropriate word) ne kaha hai ki mere saath bura hoga to mai risk nahi le sakta. Mujhe bilkul bhi self respect nahi hai. Main (insert appropriate word) hu, aur rahunga. Tab tak (insert appropriate word) rahunga jabtak aap mujhe (insert appropriate word) jaise anek gaaliya na de ya block na kare."

9.       Some people be like : Its, 15 May 2016, a nice morning eh? I just read in newspaper something about Mumbai University. I don’t even have to read it, I know it’s a scam. Oh it happened in 2012? Nice! I have ruined my life by deciding to pursue engineering. Let’s scare the shit out of some students.
“Paper Leaked. Retest on 14,15,16 June.”
To such people, rot in hell. But all we can do is 

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- Kanishk Jain

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